Priorities of an Alcoholic Relationship
It is my wife’s turn to recover. She knows it. I know it. Getting here was anything but simple.
Alcoholism is a selfish disease. When I was drinking, I put my love of alcohol ahead of everything, including my wife and kids. I would never have admitted it, but it was true. When I decided to stop drinking, I put my work to stay sober ahead of everything, again, including my wife, Sheri, and our four kids. This time, the selfishness was necessary. But that doesn’t change the fact that my family continued to take a backseat to my addiction.
Once my sobriety was on solid ground, we realized our relationship was getting worse, not better. So we worked on recovering our marriage. We worked on fixing us.
Through it all, Sheri’s recovery was ignored.
It wasn’t the first priority. It wasn’t second, third or fourth. For a long time, we didn’t even recognize the need for her to do the work to get better. Now we do. We’ve known for a while.
Here’s the thing: an alcoholic’s recovery has tangible results. Did he stop drinking, or didn’t he? For the loved one of an alcoholic, the disease causes a deterioration of mental health. Healing or not healing is less obvious. But it is incredibly important.
We hope you’ll listen to this latest episode of the Untoxicated Podcast where we discuss Sheri’s recovery. It is our top priority. If you are in an alcoholic relationship, you might want to prioritize it, too.
Such a good point Matt and wonderful that you are Sheri are being so vulnerable to this shared journey you are on. What is important is you are both rowing and developing not standing still. May there be roses ahead
Thanks Anne! Roses sound good!