“I’ll just have soda water with a lime, please,” I remember sheepishly ordering from the bartender when I was in early sobriety. “…just soda water…” I was apologizing for being so lame. Apologizing to someone I didn’t know and who didn’t care what I drank, or more importantly, didn’t care how cool I was or was not.
I had ordered a beer hundreds, maybe thousands of times, from a bartender. I had ordered more than my fair share of whiskeys or vodkas on the rocks. Not once did I use the word just when ordering liquid poison. But when I ordered a drink that wouldn’t make me obnoxious or loud, that’s when I chose to apologize? It’s as if I thought the bartender was into people who were annoying and slurred while demanding another drink.
I used to think my innocent insertion of the word, “just,” was a sign of discomfort in my new sober skin – a lack of confidence and an acknowledgement that as a non-drinker, I was the odd man out, and I knew it. But I don’t think it is simple or innocent anymore. I think it’s tragic and insidious. A grown man with a career and a family apologizing for not toxifying his brain function? That is a cultural disaster. The degree to which we feel alcohol is required or expected, well, we humans have failed the test.
And now, as the brave few of us embark on the soberevolution (if you are still reading into this fourth paragraph, you are included in the said brave few), we have to ask ourselves a question.
If we want the change, are we willing to be the change?
We don’t want to apologize because our choice of beverage won’t stunt our cranial operation. We don’t accept that the only place we can socialize with adults is in a bar, the sole purpose of which is getting us to exchange as much of our money for as much of their intoxicating potions as possible. We reject the idea that in order to loosen up, relax, have fun, talk to people to whom we are attracted or be entertained, we need a crutch because we aren’t capable of any of those things on our own.
We don’t want to say, “just,” about anything.
On Thursday, August 20th, the soberevolution continues here in Denver. At 6pm that evening, we are hosting our Sips and Giggles event featuring some delicious hand-crafted alcohol-free cocktails, tasty appetizers, beautiful artwork and the comedic stylings of Ms. Debbie Scheer. It is going to be fabulous, and you are invited. No just about it!
In fact, we won’t be offering “just soda water with a lime.” We’ll be mixing Blueberry Mint Nojitos, Spicy Mandarins and Coladatinis to name a few of the very adult, zero-proof beverages. No compromise. No apologizing. You don’t have to dumb yourself down to socialize like a grown up.
Denver humorist, professional speaker and woman with enough charisma to pull off her larger-than-life attitude, Debbie Scheer, will be treating us to a set of stand-up comedy. And it will all take place on the rooftop of the Space Annex art gallery on the southeast side of Denver. We’ll be keeping our space from each other, taking mask wearing seriously and following all the Denver and Colorado rules to prevent the spread. All the details are on the event page linked from the button below.
And you are invited. This is a soberevolution. We are determined to make Denver the capital of a refined and untoxicated approach to adulthood. I know you want the change. The question is, are you prepared to be the change? If you live in or around Denver, will you join us? Busy is a matter of priorities. How important is this change to you?
And if you don’t live here in the Mountain West, are you thirsty for some adult entertainment that doesn’t include memory loss and strained friendships? If so, send me an email, and we’ll help you organize a similar event in your town. The soberevolution is a big tent, and we need you to help us keep the momentum rolling.
A night of comedy with delicious drinks and appetizers – guilt free and shared with people who are seeking something more from life, just like you – how does that sound?
Because of COVID-19 rules, we are limited in the number of people we can include in this event. We are already about 50% to capacity, so don’t hesitate if you want to join us. Check out the details, and jump on this opportunity to safely laugh and socialize. If you wait, you “just” might miss it!
If you believe in our mission to crush the stigma of alcoholism, and you want to be part of this soberevolution, even if you can’t make it to our Sips and Giggles event, please consider making a financial contribution to our fully-tax-deductible nonprofit, Stigma. Please donate now!